Men's Travel Guide & International Dating with Foreign Women

Papaya: Eat It, Don’t Do It

If you’re like me, you probably grew up feeling relatively safe and a bit careless. Where I grew up, no one thinks twice about wearing a fancy watch, expensive chains, jewelry, or clipping the newest blackberry to the side of your belt.

But some places are different, Latin America included. In Colombia, there’s a saying that goes something like this: “No de Papaya” which translates into “Don’t give Papaya.” That doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t share your papaya with anyone. It’s a saying in Colombia that basically means “Don’t be careless and attract unnecessary attention to yourself or get taken advantage of.” Basically it means to have your wits about you, and have some street smarts. Don’t get taken advantage of by women, thieves, sales people, taxi drivers etc.

I’ll give you a couple of examples of giving papaya.

Example 1: You’re in a club and you have your phone on you. You leave your phone on the table and go to the bathroom. If you were at the table alone, you’re really giving papaya, but even if you’re with a group, leaving it there would be a bit careless, it’s still giving a bit of papaya, especially if it’s an expensive phone.

Example 2: You’re paying for a taxi and you take out a wad of cash in front of the taxi driver or when you step outside to pay for the taxi. Your giving papaya because anyone passing by will see you reach into your pocket and pull out a nice big chunk of cash, and you’re attracting unneeded and unwanted attention. Chances are nothing will happen, but you’re still giving papaya.

Example 3: It’s your first night in Cali, Colombia and you don’t know the city well. You get all dressed up and wear a nice shiny, expensive gold chain. You’re going out alone you call a taxi service (not giving papaya), but you fail to take a cautionary step and leave the fancy stuff at home, because first you need to get a feel for the city and the places you’re going to frequent. Not leaving the chain at home is giving papaya. You’re compromising your chain, money, and maybe even your safety.

So what happens when you give Papaya:
Eventually if do it enough times, you’ll run into someone who’ll want to take advantage of you. Leave your cell phone on the table and someone will snatch it when no one is looking. The taxi driver that sees your wad of cash might say he doesn’t have change to give you because now he’s seen you have a lot of money. Your gold chain attracted the attention of the wrong person and as you walk from Club A to Club B a young kid runs by and snatches it, or worse threatens to attack you if you don’t give it up.

Moral of the story: Don’t give Papaya

Latin Women Dating Tips: Tip # 2 Food

Tip #2: Food – The way to a Latina’s heart

One of the best conversational tools you can use with Latin women is: Food. Every culture is defined in part by it’s food. And Latin America is no different. Although the dishes and foods throughout Latin America have many similarities, each country and even each region within a country has it’s own specialties and even different names for what may be the same dishes. There’s a million things you can ask about the food from her country and region.

A conversation on food can lead to many places. Does she know how to cook? If she does, she might have to cook for you sometime. What’s her favorite dish from her country? Does she know any places that have good typical dishes from her country/region? Suggest a nice dinner at the places she mentions.

I know dinner dates have lost their glitter in the eyes of many. But dinner doesn’t always have to be in a restaurant. You can ask her to come over, go shopping together for all the ingredients, and help her make a typical dish from her country. Add a bottle of wine (or some other alcoholic beverage) and some music and it not only makes for a small little adventure into the super market and the kitchen, it makes for a great date.

There’s just something about eating together that creates intimacy. That intimacy gets even stronger when you’re both making the bread you’re going to break. If you think about it, most major world religions have some sort of a traditional ritual feast. Breaking bread together just brings people closer to each other.

I’m sure you’ve heard that “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” Latin women take this very seriously, but now you can use her stomach as a way to build rapport, setup great dates, and add some interesting topics into the conversation.

Tips For Dating Latin Women: Tip #1

Tip #1: A Little Spanish or Portuguese Goes a Long Way:

Whether your dealing with a Latin women at home or abroad, you can use your lack of knowledge of her language to your advantage. This particular tip is especially useful if your dealing with a Latina at home where you both speak English or if your interacting with a Latin girl abroad who knows English. I’m assuming you’ll both be communicating mostly in English, but you’ll need to use the little Spanish or Portuguese that you know to add some flirtation and fun into the interaction.

One important thing to remember is that you don’t need to be fluent in either Spanish or Portuguese to make a good impression. Like the tittle states, a little knowledge of the language goes a long way. In fact you probably know some common phrases already, like: “gracias”, “como estas?”, and “estas muy bonita” (you are really cute). I bet you knew or have heard at least two out of those three phrases. If you put a little effort into it you can probably learn 20 to 30 phrases in a weeks time.

Most latina women will find your knowledge of her language very endearing. They may asked you where you learned that? Or compliment you on your knowledge of her language, even though it may be very little. You might get a chuckle because you pronounce something wrong or because you mixed words up. The point is to make your use of her language fun and lite hearted, but at the same time you must be interested in it, and willing to learn more, particularly from her. In many cases you can use your lack of knowledge of her language as an excuse to make her your language teacher. This can be a good reason to exchange phone numbers and contact information and an even better reason to setup another date.

Your lack of language fluency can also come in handy when you find yourself in those awkward moments when neither of you have something to say. A good safety net is to just think of something or look around and ask her how you say that in her language. Many Latin women will appreciate the fact that your taking time to learn her language and culture.

This tip applies to Latinas but it can also apply to other foreign women you may meet either locally or abroad. As long as you can communicate in another language with the foreign girl (most likely English), you can use your lack of knowledge of her native or second language as useful conversational tool.

How Much Does It Cost To Live In Brazil?

Costs of living depends on various factors. First of all, as a foreigner one of the most important factors is the exchange rate between the currency you hold vs. the currency where you plan to go. Next comes location. If you live a small and medium size city the costs will be lower then living in one of Brazil’s mega cities like Sao Paulo and Rio. But location also matters within a particular city. You’ll spend more living in the high class part of town, then in the middle class, and you’ll spend even less living in the poorer parts of town, although this isn’t recommended because of safety issues. The final aspect of cost comes down to lifestyle. If you’re willing to live modestly you won’t spend much. However, if you want to ball in the city of Rio you’ll need a nice chunk of change.

How To Make Brazil Affordable, Even Cheap:

For those who are looking to take advantage or the lower cost of living in Brazil obtain a comfortable lifestyle for a lower cost, it can definitely be done. Like I mentioned above, you’ll want to rent an apartment in a middle class part of town. Don’t rent in the fanciest part of town. If you’re staying long term, don’t rent a furnished apartment. Rent an unfurnished apartment and get in the news papers and buy some used furniture found through the adds in the paper. Take public transportation and don’t rely too much on taxis. Don’t eat out at all or very little, instead shop for your groceries and cook your own food. If you live in one of Brazil’s smaller or medium size cities the cost for rent, utilities, cell phone, internet, transportation, food, health insurance, medical costs, clothes, haircuts, gym and miscellaneous expenses could range anywhere from $2,500 dollars to $4,000 per month. You can increase these costs by 50% if you move to the larger more expensive cities in Brazil.

Here’s a sample budget to show you how much you would spend per month in a small, medium size city with a comfortable lifestyle, taking some taxis, going out on weekends, having internet at home, etc.:

The Expensive Side of Brazil

Brazil use to be a lot cheaper because Brazil’s currency the “Real” was a lot weaker a decade ago. Since then, Brazil’s currency has appreciated greatly against the dollar and modestly against other currencies. For this reason, the cost of living in Brazil has increased greatly for foreigners who rely on currency differences to get great bargains. If you’re the type of person that only likes to take taxis, or wants to by a car, live in a fancy apartment, eat out often, and treat yourself lavishly in Brazil’s most well known cities you’ll find that the costs add up. Although you might save some money compared to say, the same lifestyle in New York, places like Rio and Sao Paolo wouldn’t fall to far behind on cost.

So How Much Does It Cost?

Although Brazil is not as cheap as it was, say 10 years ago, there are still various ways to live comfortably at a lower cost then most places in North America. However, it all depends on location and lifestyle. If you want a penthouse in the best part of Rio, and give yourself a lavish lifestyle, you could end up spending big bucks. By applying a more modest lifestyle you can end up living comfortably in Brazil at a very affordable cost.

Why My Friend Hated Brazil

Couple of years back when I worked in cubicle, I found out one of my co-workers had been to Brazil. At this time I had already been to Brazil, so I was eager to talk with him to see how much he liked it. I had no clue that he not only didn’t like it. He hated it. But before I approached him about it, I thought it would be impossible for a guy to hate Brazil. But he did, and I wanted to find out why. After a long conversation I was able pinpoint exactly why he was so miserable in Brazil:

#1 He stayed locked up in his apartment.
He didn’t go out at all or very little. He told me he spent most of his time in the apartment because he didn’t know anyone or where to go. If this was 1970 I would accept that excuse, but today with the Internet, the wealth of information and all of the free social networking sites, there’s not reason you should not have friends to just about anywhere you want to travel. And there’s no reason you shouldn’t have some idea of where to go and what to see, at even the most remote of destinations. All you have to do is a quick google search and bam!

#2 He didn’t learn the language:
One of the reasons he didn’t want to go out was because he didn’t know the language and he didn’t even know how to ask for directions or the most basic of phrases. Apart from that he was miserable in the apartment because since he didn’t know the language, he couldn’t understand anything on the television.

#3 He didn’t meet new people there
He didn’t have any online friends before he got there and he didn’t go out to meet any new people. In this situation, who wouldn’t be miserable. He probably felt like he was in a jail cell.

The moral of this story is that there are some basic things you must do in order to have an enjoyable trip. If you’re traveling alone and not with a buddy or a group these things are even more important. Go meet foreign women online. If you didn’t know already, foreign women make the best tour guides and provide you with a lot of safety. Do your research and find out as much information on a city as possible, including restaurants, shopping centers, tourist attractions, bars, night light, clubs etc. Finally and most importantly, get some conversational fluency in the language. If you’re in a group some of these things might not be as important, or you may have someone in your group that is taking care of these things, but if your a lone traveler, you need to your homework.

On a side note, don’t let one bad experience ruin the entire trip. I was told by a friend about a guy that traveled to Brazil and he got robbed the first day he got there right outside of his hotel. He ended staying in his hotel for the entire trip. Don’t let this happen to you. If you take my 13 steps to a safe trip you should be ok, but even if you do get robbed, or stood up by a girl or something, don’t let this ruin your trip.

How To Greet Latin Women With A Kiss On The Cheek

If you run into a Latin women anywhere in this world, or anywhere in Latin America this is a useful little tip that will get you started off the right foot.

Generally in Latin America anytime you greet someone from the opposite sex you extend your hand do small handshake or hand clasp and then pull her in for a small cheek to cheek kiss. This move includes the first time you meet someone.

The following is an excerpt from my book The Global Dating Revolution on page 175 explaining the whole process:

How To Greet People In General In Latin America

It’s also important to greet everyone in the room when you enter. North Americans are notorious for entering a room and just giving a “hey, howdy, hey!” to everyone. That is considered very rude to a Latin. Here you enter a room, and go around the room greeting each person. Kiss every woman on the cheek, even older women and younger women, and shake every man’s hand. When you depart from a gathering, you should generally also say goodbye to everyone individually. The handshake or kiss is repeated at departure.

Cheek Kissing Videos:

This first video is a video that explains the origins of the cheek kiss, and gives you some great examples and explanations of the cheek kiss:

This second video is from a Latin American soap opera. You’ll notice that the father kisses the mother and daughter both on the cheek but with his lips. The guy dating the girl gives her a kiss on the cheek goodbye but it’s a bit more intimate because their lips come very close.

For more great information on international dating and foreign women get The Global Dating Revolutionwith the 5 bonuses included for free.

International Dating: The Reality And Some of The Obstacles

There are numerous reasons why it’s going to take a long time for you to hit your stride in foreign countries. Some of these include:

• How well you know the language
• How fast you find the best night spots or if you know where they are
• How fast you find the best day spots or if you know where they are
• How fast you get use to the culture
• Overcoming stereotypes of you as a foreigner

These main barriers are the usual road blocks abroad. The most important one being language. But all of this doesn’t mean that dating environments abroad can’t be better then your local dating environment. Sometimes it just takes time to hit your stride.

Although language can be barrier, as long as you obtain some conversational fluency, it shouldn’t be much of a problem.

What you need to do is focus on the obstacles and overcoming them…

Overcoming stereotypes:
One of the main stereotypes you’ll encounter abroad, especially in Latin America is the fact that people will think you’re a rich American who’s only there to bang prostitutes. I’ve seen this all over Latin America. A lot of these stigmas come from past Americans and past foreigners who have come to Latin American countries for just that. These guys have given the rest of the “gringos” a bad name, but it is something that will change with time. The only way to get by this stereotype is to stay away from the “prepagos” or working girls, and in some cases from the places where these women frequent.

Overcoming style differences:
If you have an eccentric style like that of a rocker in the U.S.A you might have a tough time fitting in unless you find your perfect niche inside the city you’re visiting. American rock isn’t that popular throughout most of Latin America. In some cities the music might be popular but the style is pretty much non existent. The same can be said for a hip-hop type of style with fitted caps etc. You might find certain venues that cater to the music in certain large Latin America cities but in general these styles won’t help in Latin America. In these cases I would suggest you try to fit in more by changing your style a bit, to something you feel more comfortable with, but something that is more common throughout Latin America.

Finding The Best Night Spots:
In large cities the size of Buenos Aires or Bogota or even Medellin sometimes it’s taken me up to one month to find the really good night spots. I’m talking about the spots where you might be the only foreigner in the place and places that are loaded with single women. Also, these same places might be the best places to approach women who don’t speak any English.

It takes a lot of trial and error, asking around, checking different places out on different nights. In the first week you’ll find the most well know, places. Usually people will point you the priciest most well known place in the city, for example if you’re in Medellin and get in a taxi or ask anyone, they’ll tell you to go to Mangos or El Poblado, but I’ve found they’re not the best place to meet single women in Medellin.

If you’re lucky you’ll find the best places on the first week, but I usually don’t expect to find them until week 3 or 4, sometimes longer. And you’ll only find these places by being persistent and going out often.

When To Dress Up And When Not To Dress Up

You’ve probably read me blog posts on safety and dressing in Latin America.

This should give you an overall view of how to dress but there’s a bit more to it then what I’ve mentioned in the past. The thing is that it’s difficult to condense everything into two small blog posts. And if you know me a bit already, you know that I’d rather fall short on the side of safety. That’s why I usually recommend people in general not to dress to flashy.

But dressing down isn’t always good, even though it might be safe. It all depends on where your going. I’ll lay out some examples based on Colombian experience so far this year:

• Cartagena Old City: Dress Up
• Medellin 33: Dess Normal
• Medellin El Poblado: Dress Normal or Dress Up
• Medellin Mangos: Dress Up
• Barranquilla 82 & North: Dress Normal or Dress Up
• Anywhere in Colombia stratus 4: Dress Normal
• Anywhere in Colombia stratus 2-3: Dress Down

In the above examples I’ve layed out three ways of dressing:

• Dressing Up: Some Jewlery, Nice watch, Chain, Rings, Button Down Collard Shirt, Nice Shoes (Depending on the city and locale a suite)
• Dressing Normal: Maybe No Jewlery (Depends), Not too many accessories, Possible Button Down or Brand Name T-Shirt, Shoes or Sneakers
• Dress Down: No Jewlerly, Sneakers, Normal T-Shirt

If it’s your first time someplace and you’re not sure where you’re going or how the people dress there, I recommend you error on the side of safety. If anything you can dress down go back to your place and dress up and come back to the place.

In general my safety and dressing tips recommend guys to dress down so they won’t stand out and so that their safety will be the most important outcome. However, as you spend more time in Latin America and as you get more comfortable with your surroundings and get a better feeling of how safe the places you frequent are, you can elect to dress up a bit more.

Whenever you do this, do so incrementally. Don’t go all decked-out on the first night. Upgrade little by little. Dressing up definitely does help with the higher class ladies, and it’s a luxury worth taking part in, especially in foreign countries, just remember to always start on the safe side and ease into it.

Most Popular International Dating Posts

Class Division and Women In Latin America

Latin American is a very large region with a population almost double that of the United States. However, most of the countries in Latina America share one thing in common: a very pronounced class division based on economic prosperity. Certain countries like Costa Rica and Chile have less income and wealth inequality, therefore their class division isn’t as pronounced, but practically every other country in Latin America has these pronounced social borders that separate the different economic classes.

Much of this class division stems from the fact that Latin America is the most unequal region in the world in terms of income distribution. Although the level of poverty, violence, and underdevelopment is no where near many of the African countries the reasons why Latin America is the most unequal region is because very few people hold untold amounts of wealth, while the rest of the population gets by on very little. This doesn’t mean that most of the people in Latin America are starving, but it does mean that many people struggle economically, meanwhile the wealthy live like kings and take vacations to Europe, and North America like it’s nothing.

Most of the inequality in Latin America is not due a lack of talent, or willingness to work of the general public. The lack of progress in equalizing the wealth in these countries is due mostly in part to due to a continuing cycle of inequality, where corrupt governments promise change, only to rob and steal from the people and allying themselves with a few powerful interests and looting the countries coffers for themselves.

When you interact with a foreigner or a foreign girl, her outlook on life and her attitude will depend largely on which social class she belongs in her country.

Upper Class:
These are the minority and the wealthiest people in any country. The upper class throughout Latin America is very small but they’re also very very wealthy. Upper class people enjoy perks, and lifestyles that 95% of their countrymen don’t.

When it comes to meeting and dating an upper class Latin American girl, it may be much like dating an American woman. In many cases it’s because these women have had lavish lifestyles, and maybe even spent time abroad, for example getting an education at an American university. Overall I’ve noticed the most Americanized social class is the upper class, and for this reason when I’m in Latin America it’s just not my thing. Having said all this, if upper class women are your thing, I’m sure you’ll be able to find some humble, down earth, upper class Latin woman, if you look hard enough, but I wouldn’t overlook the middle, and upper middle class women.

Middle Class:
The middle class is larger then the upper class and can range anywhere from 10% to 30% of the population but is still very small compared to the middle class of other regions of the world, particularly the United States. Middle class people are generally more humble then their upper class counterparts. These are generally the people who vacation locally or to countries near by, they may have a family car and live in a decent home, and study at the 2nd tier universities. In general I find middle class women the best choices for dating abroad.

Lower Class:
The lower class population is usually the largest segment in most Latin American countries. In general this segment of the population lives in the more dangerous sections of town. Although they aren’t starving, they get by on very little. Usually it’s tough to get an college education because of the need to help the family out and work even starting at a young age, and because of the lack of money for an education.

The problem you’ll have with these women is the fact that they live in dangerous neighborhoods and the fact the most important thing for them may be economic stability. However, if you know how to navigate these waters, you’ll be able to weed out the the women who are only gold digging. Other then that, these women are easy to please material wise, they’re humble, and hard working.

My Strategy:
I generally like to meet and date women from the range of “lower-upper class” all the way through the “upper-lower class” (if that makes sense). If we broke up the social classes into 6 divisions, 1 being the lowest and six being the highest (wealthiest), like they do in Colombia, I would probably say I aim to stay in the range from 2 through 5.