2 responses to “Seeking Opportunity Abroad In International Dating”

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  Hil June 7th, 2010 at 03:48

  When I’m feeling a little uncertain about how to deal with unusual issues that arise in my relationship my Russian boyfriend (we live in Moscow), I sometimes turn to the internet to try to find insight from someone with experience in intercultural dating. Unfortunately, about 95% of the sites I link to from Google are like this one, and it’s more than a little depressing.
  If you’re an expert in international dating, how about instead of just writing about how to track down and charm beautiful women, write about some of the common obstacles and difficulties of dating a foreigner long-term and how to overcome them. Of course, you do have one post about obstacles, but seriously, knowing the hot clubs and altering your clothing style aren’t really the kind of obstacles I was talking about. No matter how many complimentary stereotypes about foreign cultures people come up with, you’re still dealing with a different mindset (and often language), and it’s a lot tougher than dating someone with the same background as you. I wish that these male-oriented sites would recognize and respond to that. And also stop painting such an overly-rosy picture of the glamour of international affairs – it’s hard work (love doesn’t conquer all: sometimes visa runs and bribes and bureaucracy put up a darn good fight) and I think you’re doing your readers a disservice just to make a buck.
  This comment is turning into a rant, which I’ve been trying to avoid, so I’ll close by saying I just wish that ‘global’ or ‘international’ dating wasn’t a euphemism for looking for a hot body abroad. Much of the material on your website makes my heart whimper like a kicked puppy.

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  Dan DeLa Cruz June 22nd, 2010 at 12:02

  Ok. A few things to address here. I agree with you the that there are many obstacles to overcome with international dating including language, culture, cost, safety among other things. I do cover many of these obstacles throughout my books and website. Perhaps you haven’t heard my interview with immigration attorney Gary Bala where we cover a lot of these topics. Or my posts on Safety with International Dating. Obviously you haven’t gone through my material thoroughly and are making a quick judgement lumping me in with the other “95%” of the sites out there. I don’t blame you for having not gone through the entire website, there’s over 100 articles blog posts, not including the The Global Dating Revolution book and the bonus books. It’s a lot of material to go through and maybe I need a bit more organization. But I do think you were a bit to quick to pass judgement on my material and website without really digging into what I’m really saying. I’m not in this to make a quick buck, and the hundreds of satisfied men who buy my book and thank me for all the valuable information and help I give them, are there to prove it.

  A lot of the obstacles you’re talking about are mostly for guys who are in the last stage of this entire international dating process. There are very few men out there who actually get to this last stage. Most Western men just either don’t know, or don’t believe that it’s possible to go to Russia (for example) and date a smart, attractive Russian girl. One of my primary goals is to get these guys on board and get them to take action. The second step is to safely guide them through the dating process, whether it’s travel abroad to meet foreign women or meeting foreign women at home. And finally the third stage is either to help them move abroad, or get married and bring their partner back home. I think I cover the first two stages very well, and I’m working on making my material more comprehensive for the final stage.