Seeking Opportunity Abroad In International Dating

A recent article on Newsweek titled “Seeking Opportunity Abroad,” detailed how an increasing number graduates from the U.S.A’s top business schools are seeking jobs abroad instead of staying right here in the United States.

Here’s a small excerpt of the article:

When Mahesh Murarka graduated from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth in June 2009, he shunned the traditional B-school path of accepting a job in banking, consulting, or marketing in New York, London, or San Francisco. Instead, he returned to his native India to work for a reinsurance company with headquarters in Switzerland. “There is a lot more opportunity here right now,” he says. “The change in India is mind-blowing.”

Many of the nation’s top business schools report an increase in the number of students who are interested in working overseas in emerging markets such as India, China, Russia, and Brazil. Roughly 25 percent of recent Wharton M.B.A. graduates are now working abroad, compared with 16 percent a few years ago, and the trend no longer applies simply to international M.B.A. students who opt to return home after earning their degrees. In addition to working in finance and consulting, these M.B.A. students are moving overseas to work in real estate, investing, energy, and infrastructure. “It definitely feels like it’s not a temporary hiccup,” says Michelle Antonio, director of the MBA Career Management at Wharton. “The students feel like that’s where the action is.”

What’s good for the MBA is good for the average guy who wants to better his dating results. If there can be more opportunity abroad for a person’s career. Or if there can more investment opportunities abroad. Or if companies can see more opportunities to expand abroad. Can there also be opportunities to better your dating results abroad?

The answer is: Can I Get a Hell Yeah!?

There are places on this planet where dating, and meeting women is tougher (from a man’s point of view). There are also places in this world like Latin America, Eastern Europe and South East Asia where meeting women and dating is easier. Of course nothing will be handed to you on a silver platter. There are obstacles to overcome, like language, culture, time constraints, etc.

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But regardless of all the obstacles the bottom line is that there is more opportunity abroad, both for recent college graduates, and for regular guys who want want to improve their dating results.

Latin Women Dating Tips: Tip # 2 Food

Tip #2: Food – The way to a Latina’s heart

One of the best conversational tools you can use with Latin women is: Food. Every culture is defined in part by it’s food. And Latin America is no different. Although the dishes and foods throughout Latin America have many similarities, each country and even each region within a country has it’s own specialties and even different names for what may be the same dishes. There’s a million things you can ask about the food from her country and region.

A conversation on food can lead to many places. Does she know how to cook? If she does, she might have to cook for you sometime. What’s her favorite dish from her country? Does she know any places that have good typical dishes from her country/region? Suggest a nice dinner at the places she mentions.

I know dinner dates have lost their glitter in the eyes of many. But dinner doesn’t always have to be in a restaurant. You can ask her to come over, go shopping together for all the ingredients, and help her make a typical dish from her country. Add a bottle of wine (or some other alcoholic beverage) and some music and it not only makes for a small little adventure into the super market and the kitchen, it makes for a great date.

There’s just something about eating together that creates intimacy. That intimacy gets even stronger when you’re both making the bread you’re going to break. If you think about it, most major world religions have some sort of a traditional ritual feast. Breaking bread together just brings people closer to each other.

I’m sure you’ve heard that “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” Latin women take this very seriously, but now you can use her stomach as a way to build rapport, setup great dates, and add some interesting topics into the conversation.

Tips For Dating Latin Women: Tip #1

Tip #1: A Little Spanish or Portuguese Goes a Long Way:

Whether your dealing with a Latin women at home or abroad, you can use your lack of knowledge of her language to your advantage. This particular tip is especially useful if your dealing with a Latina at home where you both speak English or if your interacting with a Latin girl abroad who knows English. I’m assuming you’ll both be communicating mostly in English, but you’ll need to use the little Spanish or Portuguese that you know to add some flirtation and fun into the interaction.

One important thing to remember is that you don’t need to be fluent in either Spanish or Portuguese to make a good impression. Like the tittle states, a little knowledge of the language goes a long way. In fact you probably know some common phrases already, like: “gracias”, “como estas?”, and “estas muy bonita” (you are really cute). I bet you knew or have heard at least two out of those three phrases. If you put a little effort into it you can probably learn 20 to 30 phrases in a weeks time.

Most latina women will find your knowledge of her language very endearing. They may asked you where you learned that? Or compliment you on your knowledge of her language, even though it may be very little. You might get a chuckle because you pronounce something wrong or because you mixed words up. The point is to make your use of her language fun and lite hearted, but at the same time you must be interested in it, and willing to learn more, particularly from her. In many cases you can use your lack of knowledge of her language as an excuse to make her your language teacher. This can be a good reason to exchange phone numbers and contact information and an even better reason to setup another date.

Your lack of language fluency can also come in handy when you find yourself in those awkward moments when neither of you have something to say. A good safety net is to just think of something or look around and ask her how you say that in her language. Many Latin women will appreciate the fact that your taking time to learn her language and culture.

This tip applies to Latinas but it can also apply to other foreign women you may meet either locally or abroad. As long as you can communicate in another language with the foreign girl (most likely English), you can use your lack of knowledge of her native or second language as useful conversational tool.

International Dating: The Reality And Some of The Obstacles

There are numerous reasons why it’s going to take a long time for you to hit your stride in foreign countries. Some of these include:

• How well you know the language
• How fast you find the best night spots or if you know where they are
• How fast you find the best day spots or if you know where they are
• How fast you get use to the culture
• Overcoming stereotypes of you as a foreigner

These main barriers are the usual road blocks abroad. The most important one being language. But all of this doesn’t mean that dating environments abroad can’t be better then your local dating environment. Sometimes it just takes time to hit your stride.

Although language can be barrier, as long as you obtain some conversational fluency, it shouldn’t be much of a problem.

What you need to do is focus on the obstacles and overcoming them…

Overcoming stereotypes:
One of the main stereotypes you’ll encounter abroad, especially in Latin America is the fact that people will think you’re a rich American who’s only there to bang prostitutes. I’ve seen this all over Latin America. A lot of these stigmas come from past Americans and past foreigners who have come to Latin American countries for just that. These guys have given the rest of the “gringos” a bad name, but it is something that will change with time. The only way to get by this stereotype is to stay away from the “prepagos” or working girls, and in some cases from the places where these women frequent.

Overcoming style differences:
If you have an eccentric style like that of a rocker in the U.S.A you might have a tough time fitting in unless you find your perfect niche inside the city you’re visiting. American rock isn’t that popular throughout most of Latin America. In some cities the music might be popular but the style is pretty much non existent. The same can be said for a hip-hop type of style with fitted caps etc. You might find certain venues that cater to the music in certain large Latin America cities but in general these styles won’t help in Latin America. In these cases I would suggest you try to fit in more by changing your style a bit, to something you feel more comfortable with, but something that is more common throughout Latin America.

Finding The Best Night Spots:
In large cities the size of Buenos Aires or Bogota or even Medellin sometimes it’s taken me up to one month to find the really good night spots. I’m talking about the spots where you might be the only foreigner in the place and places that are loaded with single women. Also, these same places might be the best places to approach women who don’t speak any English.

It takes a lot of trial and error, asking around, checking different places out on different nights. In the first week you’ll find the most well know, places. Usually people will point you the priciest most well known place in the city, for example if you’re in Medellin and get in a taxi or ask anyone, they’ll tell you to go to Mangos or El Poblado, but I’ve found they’re not the best place to meet single women in Medellin.

If you’re lucky you’ll find the best places on the first week, but I usually don’t expect to find them until week 3 or 4, sometimes longer. And you’ll only find these places by being persistent and going out often.

Don’t Be An Emotional Tampon

I met this girl recently and I went over her house to hang out for a bit. We were talking and getting to know each other when all of sudden we stumbled onto an interesting topic. She told me a story about a guy “friend” that she “use” to have, and the whole time she was telling me this story, I couldn’t help but cringe for the poor guy.

I’ve shortened the story up to get to the point and it basically goes like this: The girl gets married and it doesn’t work out, and she’s heart broken and emotionally torn up. The divorce is nasty and she’s going through the toughest period in her life. In comes along this other dude who obviously wants wants to be more than “just friends” but who never mans up and verbalizes it or makes any attempt to let her know that he wants to get intimate with her. The girl basically uses him for two years. She admits that he came in at the right time, and helped her through this rough period. He took her out, spent time with her, took care of her, listened to her problems, and she considered him a “friend”.

All the time she was telling me this, I knew the guy wasn’t just trying to be her friend. Obviously he wanted more, but I guess he was just too afraid to let her know.

Fast forward two years, and finally after two years of being a “friend,” he let’s his true intentions be known. He lets her know that he really likes her and that he wants to be with her. What do you think happened?

Basically, she stopped talking to him. And the poor guy, now that he let the rabbit out of the hat, keeps hitting on her more then ever.

Never be the emotional tampon.

This poor guys #1 mistake was that he waited two years for his real intentions to be known. Please don’t make this mistake. If you’re attracted to a woman, you have to let her know in one way or another that you want to move things forward. Compliment her on whatever you find attractive. Let her know you think she’s attractive. Try to kiss her. Keep moving things forward. Obviously, waiting for a few dates to do this is fine, but don’t wait TWO freaking years!

But what if she rejects you?

Be thankful that she rejects you! Not every girl you meet and go out with will be interested in sleeping with you or having a relationship with you. If she doesn’t feel the same way you feel about her, then just move on. Don’t waste your time. Rejection should be seen as a time saver. You don’t want to waste two years before you go for the kiss and then get the “let’s just be friends” line.

And speaking about the “let’s just be friends” line. If she really does want to be your friend and she’s not interested in you romantically, then tell her to hook you up with some of her friends. If she doesn’t want to do that for you, is she really you friend? Or is she just trying to use you? I think you know the answer to that one.

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